Day 2:  10 Keys to Eliminate Holiday Stress and Create More Joy TODAY!

If this holiday season has you feeling stressed and down rather than merry and bright, don’t worry, there’s help available in 10 easy steps…

Holiday Stress-Buster Key 2: Release the “Guilty Cousins”

Yesterday, we talked about the importance of recognizing your stress signs, and I gave you three great tips for getting the jump on stress before it gets the best of you. The first key provides a good, overall strategy for any time you start to feel stressed, sad, agitated or worried. (See yesterday’s blog for details).

The next three keys deal with our first specific strategy for eliminating stress:

Change your perception of what’s stressing you out.

How many times have you ever shamed, blamed or guilted yourself into doing something because you thought you were supposed to do it? (How well did that work?)

Shame, blame and guilt are the cousins we all grew up with that create the perception that:
• You ought to be doing more
• You should be able to handle it
• The world (or maybe just your family) will fall apart if you don’t
• There’s no one else to do it (or who will do it as well as you do)
• _________________________ (fill in the blank)

Obligation is a terrible motivator. Notice the weight you feel just reading these statements. It takes energy to either follow them (doing what you don’t really want to do) or resist them, and that’s energy that’s not available to you to take care of yourself, or find creative solutions that are a win for all.

What’s the antidote to shame, blame and guilt (also known as the “coulda, woulda, shoulda’s”)?

1) Ask the question: Is it True? So many times our idea of what we have to do (just because we’ve always done it) is not really real. How much must you really spend on gifts? Do you have to stand in long lines to get your shopping done? Is every social event you’ve been invited to critical? Do you have to trim the tree, buy the candles, cook the whole holiday meal, entertain, clean the house… ?

2) Then Ask: Do I want to? Is it something you love doing, feel value and valued for doing? If your “I don’t wanna” comes up, it’s a good sign you’ll be stressed by doing it!

If you find, yes it’s true, no, you don’t want to do it, then ask

3) How else can this happen? Think: in a different time frame, in a different way, by someone other than me…

Here are a few suggestions to get you started: Shop online instead of standing in line, have a potluck instead of cooking a whole meal, give gift certificates for services (backrub or massage, housecleaning, baby sitting, lunch date in 2012) instead of spending money now. Agree with friends and family to take the stress off everybody by simplifying the holidays this year.  You’ll be a hero, and everyone can breathe easier!

Remember, what people really want most is to be seen, remembered, and loved. There are hundreds of ways to show you care and share your love that won’t leave you exhausted, sad, irritable, overworked, lonely or crazed.

Changing your perception clears your vision so you can see all the wonderful, creative ways your love can shine through!

Tomorrow, more tips to create less stress and more joy through this Season of Love and Light.

Till tomorrow, “Ease on Down the Road”

Be Love and Prosper,
Felicia

PS.  If this was helpful, leave me a comment, here or on Facebook.